February 19, 2007

Itsy Bits

<> I think my husband should get himself on the news and claim to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's little girl. Why not? Everyone else is trying to jump on that bandwagon. Goodness gracious - will they all just stop it already?

<> I used to enjoy watching America's Funniest Videos on Sunday evenings while eating our supper but that's changed. For the past few months, at least one time on every single show, they show a clip of somebody puking - either a baby puking into dad's mouth while he holds her up in the air, a boy puking during his first Communion ceremony in church, a best man puking at the altar during a wedding ... etc. I realize I'm an emetophobe anyway, but could someone tell me ... is there a shortage on what's really "funny" nowadays?

<> Yesterday in the news, a dog in Florida swallowed a palm-size pond turtle. When the dog's owner noticed the turtle gone from its tub and realized the dog had been in the vicinity, she phoned the veteranarian's office and they told her to induce vomiting. The dog eventually vomited the turtle and BOTH lived. Imagine this? In this case, perhaps the vomiting was a tiny bit funny though I'm still not sure. The dog probably ended up a bit shell-shocked (oh god, I'm sorry for that).

<> When I was a young girl, everyone called me Carrie. I believe it was my Godfather who initiated it, but it really stuck. During high school, Stephen King's book "Carrie" came out and I got tired of all the cracks about how evil I must be, so I changed the spelling of my nickname to Cari instead. That was the first name I went by all my life until I moved to this state and started a new job where "Cari" just never caught on. I became Carol again and have been since.

<> My dad gave me a collection of silver dollars when I was a little girl. He used to get them sometimes in his tip cup while playing piano at clubs. They were only worth a buck apiece and I'm sure they wouldn't ever have been worth more than that, but my heart was seriously broken when I later lived alone in New Jersey and had the entire collection stolen when my apartment was burglarized. The cops found out the coins were spent at a nearby bar when some guy used them toward buying rounds for everyone in the place. Somehow, knowing their fate upset me even more.

<> We watched "Saw III" this weekend. Though I'm not big on the blood/guts, cut 'em up, eat 'em alive type of horror films, this series is different. I mean, they have all that and more, but they offer something special as well. Throughout much of the movie, I'm seriously enrapt and on the edge of my seat - which I DO look for in a horror film. Writers who can make the the roots of my hair go cold from fright ... oh boy ... those folks have a rare talent.

<> As it turns out, I guess I admire Diane Keaton. Here's a woman who, for whatever reasons, has never changed her style since she starred in "Annie" a million years ago. It's not like it's a bad style, but neither is it anything to write home about. You know, that plain Jane look - simply cut hair with little girl bangs, thinly framed eyeglasses, usually a jacket of some sort over a skirt or slacks - mostly casual but sometimes she even shows up with an awful man-tie. Still - say what you will - she has never sold herself out to what's popular or sexy. She's never worn "someone" ... rather she wears comfy clothes and a hairstyle that clearly work for her. Go Diane.

<> It feels good to be back to blogging, but it's sort of like getting into a swimming pool after the weather's been cool for awhile ... one toe at a time, then an ankle, a leg - till you get acclimated to it. It's a slow process but the final result will be rewarding and fun - I'm sure of this!


Blogger Frustrated Writer said...

I thought about claiming to be the father of Anna Nicole's baby but just the thought of how much would be left after all the lawyers get a hold of it was enough for me to think perhaps I should just volunteer to raise the child instead. At least she would be loved for herself and not for the gazillion dollar trust she inherited...

4:33 PM  
Blogger PBS said...

That poor baby, everyone wanting her for all the wrong reasons. When I was a kid we had a Golden Retriever (which I think was the turtle-swallowing dog's breed) that swallowed a squirrel, got sick a while later, upchucked and the squirrel ran away! GR's swallow all sorts of things without chewing them. Gee, we could have made the news!

4:44 PM  
Anonymous happy and blue 2 said...

PBS isn't kidding about Golden Retrievers. I heard that one swallowed a pony once and then threw it up. And that pony went on to become Black Beauty of the novel fame..
Of course this may be a rumor.I never actually saw pictures or anything..

7:08 PM  
Blogger kenju said...

It's rewarding for us, Carol!

I admire Diane Keaton, too. She hasn't sold out to plastic surgery either, and yet she looks good for her age, even with a few wrinkles.

10:28 PM  
Blogger Don said...

You're the living proof that it's not what you say, but the way that you say it. You kick my modest efforts into a cocked hat. But the best thing is, I know from having met you, your writing is an extension of your spoken facility - boy, can you tawk! Maybe that's why your'e emetophobic - puke leaves little room for words and you hate that! But you're not simply a prattler ; you're an entertainment; a joy. You are one smart arse mofo, Carol.

I'm off now to delete my blog..

5:09 AM  
Blogger Wicked H said...

You still got it my friend. Come on in, the water is fine!!!

6:47 AM  
Blogger CarpeDM said...

Yeah, I feel sorry for that kid. First she loses her brother two days after she's born and now her mom dies. And there's all these people claiming to be her father. Maybe I should claim to be her mother...hmm, I wonder if anyone would buy that.

Diane Keaton is gorgeous for her age, I hope to look that good when I hit it.

Um, the Saw movies? No way. Yikes.

So glad you're back!

8:02 AM  
Blogger Lyvvie said...

I'm a cannonball kind of swimmer, I just have make sure to hold on to my swimsuit lest is float away and leave me naked.

Then again skinny dippin' is fun too.

I'm glad you are back.

9:33 AM  
Blogger Violet said...

I started to fall away from "America's Funniest Home Videos" when it began to feel like every single clip was of some guy getting hurt... I guess the puking thing is just taking that one step further.

I'm not into blood and guts, but I keep hearing the same thing about the Saw series. Maybe I'll have to give in and watch them...

1:17 PM  
Anonymous colleen said...

Welcome back, Carol! Have you been storing this good stuff up?

I remember the very first time I saw Diane Keaton. She was wearing a gym suit on a Secret commercial and I knew she had something special.

I used to like The funniest Videos too, but I think they get carried away with awful crashes and falls. After a while it's like vomitting, not funny. I think Candid Camera was better.

Well if Ed claims to be the father of Anna N. Smith's baby, he might be a murder suspect too.

8:13 PM  
Blogger Michelle said...

OMG @ the turtle still alive!!
I loved all the Saw movies, absolutely brilliant, and of course it helps that the writer & director are both Australians :o)

12:26 AM  
Blogger Swathi said...

i totally luff 'Annie Hall' - boy! tatz one helluva movie where all the dialogues are totally worth recounting time and again.

6:23 AM  
Blogger Alisa said...

I wish they'd just take the paternity tests and get it done with already. Gawd that kid is going to be so screwed up.

8:00 AM  
Anonymous hellbunny said...

Good to see you back blogging.
I like the Saw movies as well.I don't think its blood and gore that make a good horror movie but good writing that can create that feeling of dread and suspense.

10:50 AM  
Blogger Dave Morris said...

Between the dog puking the turtle and the kid puking in dad's mouth, there's a lotta vomit going on here at the outpost...

I have a friend who insists I watch the Saw series of movies with him, which I am about to do. I'm much more comfortable with your recommendation than his, he tends toward the weird.

4:43 PM  
Blogger Walker said...

I touched the tv once when Anna Nicole Smith was on, does that count?

I bet the dog is happy it didn't come out the ither way. LOL

Have a nice day

2:39 PM  
Blogger Justine said...

I'm still getting back into blogging shape myself, Weary.

I am also emetophobic, but maybe not as much as you. Honestly? I just wanted to use the word.

That is a sad story about your silver dollars.

I have to go and disciplne these ridiculous cats I live with....

5:06 PM  
Blogger Justine said...

Cats were just attacking the cords to the stereo.

I don't get how the dog could have managed to through up a turtle. Imagine throughing up a turtle! I can barely swallow a panadol.

5:08 PM  
Blogger L said...

glad you're back :)

9:05 PM  
Blogger Kirsten said...

Welcome back, Weary! You've been missed.

I remember getting silver dollars from the tooth fairy. Hubby and I have been passing them on to our oldest rugrat (the only one old enough to be losing teeth so far), and it kills me when he wants to spend them. There's just something about those coins...

9:09 PM  
Anonymous John said...

Good post Carol, I mean Carrie! The comment on the puking strikes home with me, I saw those same ones not too long ago and they really are kind of gross. But still I find them funny too... Thats weird isn't it!

The videos with the kids who have wedgies are still funnier. Have a great week/weekend.

12:53 PM  
Blogger Lightning Bug's Butt said...

Yep, that pool analogy applies. Just think of all us pruned up people who never got out!

1:01 AM  
Blogger Johnny Virgil said...

Yes, the water is cold and there's been significant shrinkage. I am also glad you're back.

1:53 AM  
Blogger 中島美嘉mika said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:17 PM  

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