I Got Nothin ~ Pretend This is a Really Good Post

Read Between the Lines ?

1. Some days I find that I just can't be creative in any way at all; can't write, can't rhyme, can't hold a damn note, can't even play chopsticks. I stare at the TV and get plenty of exercise rolling my eyes as I flip through the channels... then I try to spend some time online but nothing there feels really satisfying either. I always wish, on days like that, that I could have bottled up some of that creativity - then I could just pop the top of that bottle and get on with a good day. But I know this guy who would have told me "That's part of the problem, Haggie... you should have been wishing you could bottle up the satisfaction you got from the those things instead... then you could still sit around doing absolutely nothing but you'd be totally content." Hm.

2. One thing I find a bit bothersome ... much of my writing in this blog has been in a rather nostalgic vein. Let me rephrase that. Much of what I'd consider my good writing in this blog has been in a nostalgic vein. Some, though not too much, was informative. Why then, for all the wine in France, are my stats telling me that I get more hits on "How To Kill a Frog" than any other piece? Are there that many people out there trying to kill frogs? Why? If they're not trying to kill them, why are they interested in reading about how it's done? (which, by the way, the piece has very little to do with)

3. A ninety-four year-old woman last week received some sort of transplant. I admit to thinking "Cripes - why?" while reading the article. Then I substituted her name with my ma's and it all made crystal clear sense. I wonder what means to prolong life they will come up with by the time, and if by some freakish chance, I should turn ninety-four.

4. Apparently I will be heavy, slow, achy and grouchy in my older age and I will have only faint memories of those old catcalls and whistles as I used to hear while walking by the fellas (sigh), but one thing I will not have is droopy earlobes. My earlobes, I am thrilled to report, are as perky now as they were thirty years ago and as whole as they were on May 14, 1955.

5. There are some very, very popular and well-loved folks who I just cannot bring myself to fully appreciate. I will list a few ... and we can probably just go ahead call this bullet note "Who Does Hag Think She Is Anyway?"

~Billy Joel ~ He's just never been a favorite of mine and although I can appreciate his writing skills, I think I've only ever truly loved one or two of his complete compositions. There, it's said. Phew.

~Tina Turner ~ I feel for the gal for having had a rough start (and finish) with Ike, but there are probably over two hundred women on any given day living through that mess and worse; I'm just not sure how much credit she merits for having had poor judgement. I find her style to be screechy and annoying ... ALWAYS ... after the first few moments of any given tune. I do, however, give her major props for all three of her dance moves. Oh. Did I write that out loud?

~Bob Hope ~ It's not that I disliked him, and in fact, I quite enjoyed some of the old "Road to..." movies and stand-up routines. I guess as I got a li'l older, I started to feel he was drying up and maybe even (I dare say) losing the lustre - comically. It happens ... but the media kept dragging poor Bob out again and again to guest spot on talk shows and the like, and his delivery by that time was so downright awful that I used to wriggle uncomfortably in my seat just watching. I know I know ... he did fine things for the troops. For all of that, he was a marvelous and benevolent soul, but comically, he just didn't move me all that much.

---Blogger won't let me leave a space here for some reason, so I hope it's just in the editing mode and will turn out looking okay. Anyone know how to make it do that when it won't recognize the return/enter key? ---

~Paul Simon ~ What can I say? I loved Simon & Garfunkel. I love Art Garfunkel and think he's one of the most under-rated artists of his (our) time. On the other hand there are very few Paul Simon tunes (written and performed by him) that really move me to emotion. When they did, they REALLY did ... but most just didn't. I see him as a quite the snot nose and I don't think there's anything particularly spectacular about his voice.

Like I said --- I know it's not very sexy to dislike the folks listed above, but as is true of most of my endeavors, I ain't goin' for sexy. Plus - it felt kind of good to finally get that in writing.

Surely there's someone in today's spotlight that you aren't particularly fond of ... care to mention it either in a comment or in your own post? I'd love to know about it.

Wishes for a fine rest-o-the-week to all ... and thanks for reading!

Blogger Canvass

* G-man got tired of posing and sauntered off *

Happy weekend!

I've put together some questions about blogging for anyone who would like to participate ... you can think of it as a survey if you'd like ~ to absolutely no end other than satisfying my curiosity ~ or you can think of it as a fun post (?) to use for a rainy day when all else, topically, seems to fail.

Just for the sake of Naming Things, let's call this :

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Weary Hag's Blogger Canvass

1. While typing - do you prefer classic or italics? [my own answers are below]

2. While reading - do you prefer classic or italics?

3. Worst experience while blogging? [i.e. page froze, lost data, caught using dated or false info, typos - what made you gasp - even a li'l]

4. Best experience while blogging? [i.e. new friendship/relationship formed, wrote a post that was just short of genius, learned new com tech skill, etc]

5. Let's assume you're an avid blogger - someone at an intimate dinner or party suggests that blogging is for idiots. In what way do you beat the dog meat out of them - [read: handle the situation] - if at all?

6. Do you pass your blog URL out to people like sneeze molecules or do you generally keep it to yourself and your own group of mutual blog buddies?

7. Do you share your blog with family [children/spouse/siblings/parents] or do you deliberately keep it from them?

8. This is for those who only use a fabricated name when blogging: Do you ever wish you could tell people just exactly who you really are or are you content to remain anonymous to the masses?

9. This is for those who use their true name when blogging: Do you ever wish you had remained anonymous or are you pleased as punch to get your real self out there?

10. Of these - which is your favorite genre to read in the blogging community: [choose ONLY one]

a) how-to & advice, b) brief topics covered with a comedic edge, c) personal adventures or experiences, d) photos with captions, e) up-to-the-minute newsy type stories told with blogger's perspective or spin

11. From one to ten, when reading a blog post ... do spelling & grammar really count? (not the occasional typo). One: they don't count in the least .............. Ten: stop reading midstream and move on.

12. Have you been approached to write a book or magazine article or to contribute to an existing publication in any way, solely based upon your blog? (and I don't mean by smokinbettylou or tedthetool)

13. Do you prefer the read & comment type of post or the interactive style (like this one)?

14. Which applies to you most often? a) I read and comment, b) I read and move along ...

15. Are you involved in any other networking venues or is blogging your one and only? [i.e. FB, YT, MSpace, LiveJournal, Classmates, photo hosting sites, etc.] No need to name them unless you want to ...

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I'd love to see bloggers' answers to these questions ... if you'd like to participate, could you let me know so that I can read your post?

My own answers are below ~ but I laid it out this way so that you could just copy/paste the questions themselves from above without having to go back and delete my responses.

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Weary Hag's Answers:

1. Italics

2. Classic --- so somebody loses every time. If you prefer to type in itals, the ones who prefer to read in classic are bagged. And vice versa. I'm even screwing myself! Oh lord.

3. It's a toss-up between a lost post that was about 40k or a really insulting and sucky comment of a personal nature... both made me gasp

4. I "met" folks like Judy, and Dave Morris, Tabor and Walker and Paul, Bug, Coll and Colleen, and that's enough naming because I know I'll leave out too many important people. We don't connect daily [anymore] but they have truly become pieces to my life-jigsaw now and they would be sorely missed if they fell under a couch cushion.

5. I would simply HAVE to say something in defense of blogging. Trouble is, they might be sorry they opened that particular can of worms... I could talk about the benefits and addiction to blogging for hours. No, I mean it.

6. I used to keep it to my blogging buds only. Now I shamelessly share it with other Net contacts (my YT channel, my MySpaces). I don't know. As I age and become more fragile, I feel it's important that people know I'm here. Well, that and ... when you realize you've virtually disappeared in certain (FAMILY) circles you were once a part of ... you clamor to recapture some sense of visibility.

7. I've shared. Only my husband shows interest. Soooo wait - doesn't this mean I can badmouth all the rest? HaH! I'm thinking Y to the ES!

8. Weary Hag has become such a part of me now. In fact, I don't know for sure that I haven't become such a part of her ... I'm ever-amazed when I google those words, either smushed together or separate ... all the leads that come up. I used to be anonymous. Now everyone who has ever asked pretty much knows I'm Carol, or Bflat (my music persona). Anonymity lasted about a week for me; I find it tough to stay the course.

9. Oh. I think there's much to be said for anonymity in the blogging community. That said though ... I must point you back to my answer number six above.

10. Shit. I've asked a question I hate. If I can only choose one that leaves out about four bloggers who I love. But ... I must choose only one ~ "c" ... probably not a huge surprise to anyone reading.

11. I give this a strong six. There's spell check and if you know you have issues with spelling ... use the mofo. If you have that "I don't give a hoot" attitude, then well ... how can I? As to grammar, I can be more forgiving, but since this Hag has coupled it with spelling - my answer is a strong six.

12. As freaking if. (I will say that I was approached by a "tedthetool" many years back in ICQ ... but he could neither spell a word nor use it in a sentence so ... )

13. Reading and commenting IS interactive, you silly Hag. I think people will understand the subtle difference here ... and I do like to interact. Spinning Girl has a nice little interactive post almost once a week; a little word game. Fun times.

14. Oh... if I read, I usually comment. Exceptions: house on fire, hairball from one of three cats near foot, I totally don't understand what's being said or have nothing at all positive to contribute no matter how simple, but even then I'd usually say something like "I don't get it." I'm a tawka --- I comment.

15. Wordpress (inactive), YT (highly active), Facebook (inactive), MySpace (active but only as a link to my YT! ) Blogger & YouTube are my faves.

To all who enter here ... thank you for coming.

To all who read my posts ... thank you so very much for taking the time to read me.

To all who read my posts and interact with me in any way such as: PM, email or comment ... you truly give me reason to keep the Outpost open and this is such a positive thing in my life ~ love yiz for this.

...So As I Was Saying...

Holy mackerel. It was already time for another therapy session and I felt as though I had just finished putting Christmas ornaments away. Ho hum. Off I went ...

"Therapist" will be recorded as "T" and I will be recorded as "WH" for purposes of saving space and time, and to avert the probability that more words will be misspelled.

WH:[walking in gingerly after it had been so long a time]

T: [stands, offers hand] Weary! It's been a while ... come, sit down ... I can see you're feeling awkward ... no worries, that won't last long.

WH: [taking a seat facing the window] Good to see you - I think.
T: Why "I think?"
WH: Well who likes to admit they may actually need therapy?
T: Sometimes, the smartest folks seek feedback and insight ... something to think about. But anyway ... what's been happening in your life?
WH: Where to begin [gazes out window] ... well I stopped writing, you know.
T: WOW ... that's HUGE. You? Stopped writing? As in, forever?

WH: At first I figured it was a passing phase. Couldn't get my thoughts in order, was feeling deplete of creative energies. I backed off of blogging for a time ... but then it felt more and more like a permanent move ... like something I had closed the lid on.
T: And did you? Close the lid, as you put it, on blogging?
WH: I guess I did ... but then, I'm back here talking to you ... wondering if it's something I need open again. [shrugs shoulders] I don't know ... I mean it's not like I can't just go in there and jot down a few things as I see fit, right?
T: You tell me... is it like that? I mean, are you comfy with that?
WH: Feels half-assed if you ask me.
T: I did ask you.
WH: [mumbles softly] Christ ... here we go again. [thinks to self: why do I DO this to myself?]

T: So what else have you been doing with your time?
WH: I hooked up with a YouTube channel ... you familiar with this?
T: Sure... the place where folks park their videos.
WH: Yeah. "Park" ... good verbage there T.
T: So you create videos for others to see?
WH: Yeah, been doing a li'l singing here and there.
T: Oh wow ... something you've mentioned enjoying in your past ... good to hear that you chose a positive distraction rather than a negative one.
WH: I enjoy it. Others don't seem to mind. It's fun. Gets me up and about a li'l ... makes me feel younger somehow. Feels like, when I sing... I'm that old, young-me again... not this sore, achy, pill-popping fart that I've morphed into.

T: Pill-popping?
WH: You know ... meds. Prescriptions. Six. No wait - seven. I think there are seven per day... that doesn't include vitamins or minerals.
T: So what? Why is the number of pills important? They keep you on track, no?
WH: They keep me feeling like an older-than-I-really-ought-to-be fart.
T: But you realize you need them to live.
WH: [nods ... stares out window again] ... m hm ... So I take them. But I came today for a different reason than all this ...

T: By all means ... what's cooking?
WH: Sometimes I DO feel like I want to write, but there's SOOOO much going on in my head that I'm not sure where to begin. And I can't really commit to a consistent blog anymore ... you know... doing the whole community thing like one ought to do.
T: Are there rules to blogging?
WH: Sort of ... oh not in the sense you're sarcastically referring to ... just in the sense that "I'll rub your back and even though you don't really have to, it sure would be nice if you rubbed mine back." That sort of thing ...
T: And can't you manage that?
WH: I run short of time. I always run short of time.
T: Yet you have time to post new items ... but when it comes to reading others' you run short. Did I hear that correctly?

WH: Christ ... you put it that way and you make me feel like an ass! I mean, I know people who do that on purpose... never visit around, never read other's stuff ... only put their efforts on their own self-proclaimed masterpieces ... I can't understand that sort of arrogance ... it bugs the ever-lovin' mess out of me! I'm not that way. I'm not. And that's just it. People might assume I am that way ... which would suck. And I wouldn't want that at all. So I stay away.
T: Whoa... I only wondered if that wasn't what you were saying ... clearly this whole thing bothers you more than you're saying.
WH: Well it bothers me in that I'm different from that type of person ... you know ... the one who only gives a hoot about his/her own posts. I do give a hoot about other's posts... really enjoy them, when I ever make my way over.
T: Then there you go. There IS a difference and you've got that settled in your head. It sounds as though you've got the desire to visit around ... do the give-n-take ... the ones who are only into themselves wouldn't even make the effort if the opportunity jumped out in front of them. Yes?
WH: Pretty much.

T: So what's the solution?
WH: What was the problem? I truly forget.
T: You want to write on occasion... share your thoughts with anyone who happens by. You do not wish to disappoint. You are ALWAYS hung up on disappointing ... you know that. That's why it always took you about twenty minutes to write your posts and three hours to decide if they were worthy of publishing or not. Maybe we ought to delve into that a bit?
WH: Number one ~ you're a therapist... you needn't be using words like "hung up on" ... number two ~ no. I can't delve into any such thing.
T: Perhaps "hung up on" was a bit strong ... but you know there's an issue there. I'm not sure why we have these sessions, Hag, when you don't want to cover any real ground.

WH: Look - it's been ages since our last sit-down. We had to break the ice. We always waste too much time in the beginning of the sessions anyhow ... that's what you people do. You must ensure that your client will return ... what better way than to hold off on the nitty gritty stuff till the very end when you can call "TIME" ... right?
T: [stares at WH - stares, stares - borderline glaring but keeps it to a professional, dull roar]
WH: I suppose that wasn't very nice of me ... sorry. Great, now I'll beat myself up for an hour because I put my foot in my mouth ... jeeze ... you see, I ...
T: [softly but purposefully interrupts] Uh ... We need to stop here ... we can certainly pick this up next time ... how's that sound?

WH: Sounds like you've made sure to get me back for another session. Good job!



"One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are, when you don't come home at night." by Margaret Mead

Thank you to anyone who wondered where I was ... or wished I'd come home again ~ Weary Hag

I Got a New Attitude

I lost my spirit to write.

I found a hunk of it elsewhere. This has been pretty darned therapeutic for me as it has truly turned things around in many ways.

I will never deliberately abandon The Outpost and will use it from time to time if I rediscover my writing-self. I hope some friends might still be around to visit on occasion. My email remains intact and I welcome all correspondence and promise to reply to it - always.

What a great experience Blogspot has been for me.

I'm now spinning more melodic tales over here if anyone would like to drop by. I hope you will. I always have ~ and continue to ~ think of each person I met on here at varying times and in varying ways.

Thanks for being the friends you were (I do hear an empty echo...but that's clearly understood ... things come around full circle... life changes... it dances all around us ... sometimes it even sings).

Carol aka WearyHag aka Bflat aka "who knows what's next..."