September 11, 2007

"Address Unknown"

Anne Marie Martino Cramer

3/30/54 ~ 9/11/01
47 years old


Dear Anne,

Hoo boy ... so today's 9/11 and well, you know what that means? Here we go again ...

Do I close up like a frightened turtle and choke back all the junk I want to cry and scream about, or do I act in mature, ladylike fashion and simply talk about it in subdued tones so as to please the masses? Point is, it's 9/11 and on this Tuesday morning six years ago, you rode the elevators up to your 90th floor office in the South Tower of the World Trade Center. You sat at your desk, put your purse in its worktime place, greeted your coworkers as if it were just another day, maybe you sipped your coffee and checked email and voice mail - or maybe you were reading the latest stats on your beloved Yankees... and then at some time throughout a most dreadful series of nightmarish happenings, you breathed your last breath. So today I'll remember, I'll talk about it, and I'll mourn over it ... quietly ... but nothing will stop me.

I will ignore all the people who get verbal and shook up when someone chooses to remember and to spend this particular date each year in reverence and with moments of grief. There are a lot of those lucky bastards out there ~ I suppose I can understand their ignorance on some level, though I wish they'd just shut up already. I've moved on dammit ~ but the memories will not. Not today, not tomorrow and I'm going to venture a guess ~ not fucking ever.

Oh yeah, and get this ... there are people all over the world and even right here in the States and I know you won't imagine this but even right in NYC itself, who think it's overly maudlin to still hold official memorials and such for the victims of 9/11. This group of folks is just plain tired of hearing about the whole ordeal. They're tired of hearing about people still mourning over their losses - tired of hearing the word "terrorism" and even the simple word "attack" ... can ya stand it? I mean, maybe it feels like it's unavoidable in the news on this day ... and maybe even during other times of the year too - but to me the only real purpose it serves for those who are loud about their disgust and impatience is that it shows who the lucky ones are. I'm just guessing they either weren't too close to the situation or didn't lose a loved one.

Well Anne, Anna, Annie ... Anne Marie, it's time to close up and move along. All day though, I will quietly wonder about many things. What could have or would have been different if there had been no attack and if 9/11 really was just another day?

Got to go now. I miss you, my little Italian friend.

Annie Facts
She was an incredible softball/baseball/stickball player in her youth
Anne was quite proud of her Italian heritage
She was a twin - her brother Tony still lives in the same house where they grew up together (two doors away from my own childhood home)
She loved Snoopy or anything Charlie Brown-related
Anna was very proud of her older sister, Pat and when she and I were little kids, we used to argue with one another about which of us had the most beautiful older sister. haha ... I laugh at this one because we surely did have ourselves some 'noisy' arguments.
She and I spent many of our teenage weekends down at the Jersey shore
She worked at exactly ONE job ever since graduation from high school - this was the same company she was working at the day she died - that's almost 30 years
I remember thinking that Anne was completely fearless when we were high school age.
Anne was related to many people in and around Hoboken NJ, one of them having been Frank Sinatra himself.
She was only about 5 ft 3 inches tall. She had lovely, very thick, very dark brown hair.
She loved to sing and one of her favorite early 70s bands was the Doors (her twin brother could precisely imitate Jim Morrison's voice)
I think it's very neat that the street where I grew up has been renamed in her honor.
I made this little list because these are the kinds of things they don't include in obituaries or victim directories. Thanks for taking the time to read it.


Blogger kenju said...

Carol, it is always great to see a post from you, even when it is a sad reminder of a horrible day. I say to the people who want not to memorialize it anymore - screw you. We should remember all those who lost their lives that day every year, until forever.

10:30 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

Hi Carol :)

yes, there are certainly plenty of people out there that don't want to remember this day 6 years ago...they may feel it's dragging on the grief of so many...that others directly affected should just get on with their lives. But the bottom line is, those directly connected with this senseless tragedy will always be affected by it, it is and always will be, a date in their history when their lives changed.

Annie sounds like a wonderful person and I'm so glad you shared your childhood friend (and adult friend) with us today. She certainly deserves to be remembered and given a 'voice' today, as do the rest of the fallen.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

1:40 AM  
Blogger Wicked H said...

Thank you for sharing that, I will NEVER forget that day and will also never apologize for the way that dates makes my heart ache.

Many hugs to you!

8:15 PM  
Blogger Tabor said...

I am one of those people who cannot dwell on goodbyes and who try to push thoughts of lost loved ones as far back in the mind as I can. But I certainly respect the right of everyone to grieve as often and as long as they want to help the healing process.

8:20 PM  
Blogger CarpeDM said...

This was absolutely beautiful. And as to those who think we shouldn't do public memorials or anything, well, you're right - maybe they didn't lose anyone connected to this. But so what. A lot of people died and that is very sad. I think that it is sweet and kind to want to remember these people. Those who don't care anymore don't have to listen.

Thank you for sharing your friend with us.

1:23 PM  
Blogger Walker said...

This day will be carved in time forever.
It doesn;t matter who or where you are.

The shear magnitude of it will keep it alive in the minds of millions and in the hearts of those who were touched by this event personally.

Many don;t want to think about it becauser it brings back bad memories but it should also bring comfort knowing a Nation, a World united to show their unity against suck acts of cowerdice.

Great post Carol

1:41 PM  
Blogger PBS said...

What a beautiful tribute to your friend. Annie lives on forever in the memories of the people who loved her. The same is true for all of the victims of 9/11.

2:04 PM  
Blogger brooksba said...

I'm sorry I didn't visit the day you wrote this about Anne. It's good to remember, even if it is painful. You touched me with your words over your friend. And while I'm not glad that the events happened, I am glad that you do still care and that you remember. Thinking of you.

4:43 AM  
Blogger MYSTIC said...

I would have loved to gotten to know her. Sorry for your and the world's loss.

4:41 AM  
Blogger Spider Girl said...

I've always wished obituaries were more beautiful. Like this.

12:29 AM  
Blogger Dave Morris said...

This is really, really sweet.

I watched the entire replay of the morning of September 11 on MSNBC this year and got pissed off all over again. I want to do that every year, so the people who died won't be forgotten.

11:46 AM  

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